Some Amount of Time (don't read while eating)

So for the next couple of weeks the elementary school I'm working at is conducting experiments on the pupils.

These experiments include trying to stack as many as possible on top of each other, or seeing how many synchronised collapses (between pods of four students) can be achieved in a limited time.

In other parts of the world this is called sports day.  Here, I am somewhat reluctant to call it that because no sports are involved.

They dance around to cutesy sounding (see: vomit inducing) songs while trying to maintain a semblance of synchronisation.  They all spend their time in front of TV's and computers, just like me.  Unlike me, they never leave this sedentary state.  Ever.  The result is, quite frankly, hilarious.

I'm (probably) contractually obliged to withhold laughter when I see twelve year olds picking up their lightest classmates (three of them picking one up, in a pyramid style formation) to quickly drop him, but I'll be damned if it isn't one of the funniest things to see the kid who was dropped, jump back up and kick the crap out of the inevitably larger people who dropped him.  After a few hits I intervene of course, but I fear the big kids won't learn the lesson of Napoleon without some peer-prompting.

The reason I mentioned computers and television?  The 'dance routines,' have nothing to do with strength.  They are entirely co-ordination and balance.  Upon seeing this, I was immediately worried.  Having seen the older kids in middle school struggle to stay on their feet when simply running a relay I couldn't see how the younger, naturally less well balanced, would fare while picking each other up.  My fears were proven.

No one has been hurt yet.

What none of the teachers seem to realise is, having the really fat kids (of which there are only, mercifully, a few) hold the bigger kids is a mistake.  It's about poise and balance.  The little kids are really good at balancing their peers on each others shoulders, but the fat kids wobble all over the place.

And they can't balance them either.

I question the point of having a sports event without sports, but the designers knew their stuff when coming up with things for the kids to do.  (Having been to a couple of these now, it seems the events are universally adopted across the prefecture, if not all of Japan.)  It is a crying shame the american passion for cheer leading and other pointless activities has leaked into Japanese society, but they do at least incorporate some traditional Japanese dances.  The one I linked a few weeks ago is quite popular - and it looks fantastic when done properly.  If you ever get the chance to check it out (I don't know why you would, but anyway...) I would definitely give it a look.

This week I have a cold, and as a result have been having a few nose-bleeds.  I assume brought about by sneezing my way through the day; although my head being nanometres from an explosion might also be the cause.  I suspect my eyes might be the weak-point through which the pent-up pressure will dissipate.  If you see a headline in the news akin to 'man explosively decompresses, makes terrible mess,' it will either be a food poisoning outbreak; or my head.

On the flip side, real-world considerations of an explosive nature were announced today.  The yanks are selling a number of upgrades for the Taiwanese air force.  Having been lucky enough to meet a number of Taiwanese people, I can safely say that Taiwan is a country devoid of respect for china.  As such, it is a country, not a protectorate of china.  It is not chinese Taiwan.  Every Taiwanese person thinks this, everyone in the world knows this - but china refuse to accept it.

Then again, I just remembered that china is the most powerful country in the world, who regularly employ cyber espionage specialists to steal secrets from other countries and ensure their name is not besmirched.

ALL HAIL CHINA, LEADERS OF THE (FREE) WORLD.

That should appease them for now.

The funny thing is that Taiwan is not worth as much money to america as china - so they get the shaft despite being an 'ally,' for decades.  China is sworn enemy number three behind Iran and North Korea, but they have all the money in the world; so let's appease them.

Capitalism, the finest example of hypocrisy this side of communism, which is itself the finest example of hypocrisy since capitalism, which is itself the finest example since hypocrisy since communism, which is...

Google, owners of everything (and that article is three years old (just skip to the list of companies, her writing is devoid of any merit)) are accused of being a monopoly and unfairly taking advantage.  If all the worlds searches are conducted through google, and google sites are some of the most visited on the interwebs, doesn't is stand to reason that they would, in essence, be linking to themselves.  This is an inevitable conflict of interests for the consumer, but one that can't really be legislated against.

I guess they'll have to pull a microsoft and split the company up.  There go a few hundred jobs.

In other news, it turns out Hugo Boss was a nazi.  I actually had to google who Hugo Boss is, then I found out he does perfumes or something.  I stopped giving a crap at this point.

Wikileaks founder and (almost) convicted pervert has written a book.  Interesting stuff, as is the constant insistence that this guy is a rapist.

There are very few cut-and-dried cases of media deception in this world.  Most are deliberately muddied in order to obscure the facts, and in the best case scenario, discredit all sides, leading to a stalemate.  As such, nobody ever knows what's truth and what's a lie.

The Assange case was one of the most blatant pieces of governmental pressure the world has seen, leading to false accusations and arrest warrants born of fictitious crimes.  Wikileaks launched, showing most of the world how corrupt, broken and vindictive the secret police of america are - then within hours he's a rapist.

Erm.

The guy probably isn't an angel (no one is) but I would be inclined to believe him, even if he murdered a goat, with his teeth, right in front of me.  If someone puts false claims like that around the world within hours of him becoming infamous, he has obviously done something extremely important.  If it shows the world how useless america, england, France, Germany and the Scandinavian countries are - more power to him.

The seriousness of female rights took a turn for the worse, with female soldiers reporting back that war sucks.  These are women who aren't fighting on the front lines, and they're getting PTSD.  I'm sure men who fill their roles also do, but the BBC doesn't do a report about a man who drives a sergeant to and from work every day getting PTSD.

This is all written about the american military, so I wonder how much of applies to the army, navy and air force back home.  The image I get is one of the american military basically being a militia of hooligans, whereas only our army falls into that category, and only then some of the time.  That's probably just media bias, and a skewed view of england.

Quote of the year comes from a certain Lei Chen Wong of WildAid.  Speaking in this article to the BBC regarding the de-finning of sharks, for the raw ingredient of shark fin soup.


"There is this myth in China that sharks will regenerate their fins, but that's not true. They actually die a very slow, painful and cruel death"


I refuse, outright, to believe that a human being could be so stupid as to think a shark would regrow its fin.  Honest to god, if I met someone who believed this, I have no idea whether I would be able to control my laughter before punching them in the face.


If I chop your leg off, will it grow back?


Jesus christ chinese people are stupid.


Another peach of a quote: 'Materialism is well developed in China but other things, such as morality, haven't progressed so well,' as if materialism was something to be encouraged along the lines of morality.  Astounding stupidity abound in this article then.


That's it for the news roundup; I'm tired from all the laughing and raging I've been doing.




The Japan Tonga game was something.  It was, essentially, a game of sevens perpetrated by a group of fourteen year olds, such was the level of control evident.

I personally love that kind of rugby, where turnovers happen every third play, and members of both teams are strewn about the pitch.


The second half saw things calm down and it was much less interesting from then on, but Tonga were most certainly worthy winners.  Whenever Japan got the ball they looked dangerous, until they passed the ball a second time; at which point they dropped it, or ran into someone twice their size and four times stronger, or they ran into touch, or kicked it.


Japan would have been a threat if they knew which way to run.  Unfortunately they didn't, and that ultimately cost them the match.


They look good in broken play, so I suggest they stick to sevens rugby.  I think it would suit their style much more than the full game.  It was a solid victory in the end, despite Japan beating them in the pacific nations cup not long ago.  Maybe it was just a fluke that time around?  The next pacific cup will show whether they're consistent contenders in that particular tournament.


For the state of Asian rugby, they really need to start pulling their weight - that means not just losing well, but winning too.


On a side-note, the saffers are playing Namibia today, which is the first time two African nations have met in the tournament.  It will be a resounding defeat for Namibia, but at least the claim that rugby is a global sport is starting to ring true.  Now we just need a fully competitive 20 team tournament, and rugby will be alongside football in that regard.