Of Testing in Japan

So I'm currently administering the umpteenth set of speaking tests.  Of the thousands I've conducted so far, one thing strikes me as particularly interesting.  When a kid fails, they're forced to do the test over, and over, and in some cases, over again until they get it right.  Obviously speaking isn't taught in Japanese schools, so often most kids will pass with mediocre results (I don't mark based on the american curve, you can either do it, do it okay, or not do it).  This is great because it means the average is consistent among classes, and we can see which classes are faring better than others.  It's not great because it means that people who are not good enough, fail.  Now, people seem to think that the epidemic of abstaining from failure, from ensuring everyone passes despite having no ability is isolated to England.  That is most certainly not the case.

There are five levels of grade for the internal testing we do at the school.  At this point I must stress that these tests have no bearing on the certification they receive upon leaving school, they are not nationally endorsed tests.  They simply show the school and governors where each student is in regards to the curriculum being 'taught.'  They are broken down into five categories.  The bottom category, as already mentioned, requires the student retake the test in order to continue.  Not only does this create extra work for the teacher, it makes them look bad.  Having a student fail is tantamount to a critical failure by the teacher.  Forget the fact that most, if not all of the fail grade kids would be put in special needs institutions anywhere else in the world, the teacher is obviously the one to blame (the system is perfect - THE SYSTEM IS PERFECT).

Anyway, I was only allowed to grade the kids on a 1-4 scale after the first round of tests made me re-test a dozen kids from every class (they'd walk in, sit down, speak some Japanese then walk out).  Unsurprisingly the bottom grade was the one dropped, which meant I could only grade the kids on pass marks.  For whatever reason, none of the kids could answer any of the questions.  The average was somewhere between a D plus and C minus.  The inevitable conclusion was to grade the kids on a 3 mark scale.  The D being dropped.  This meant no one could get below a C in the grading scheme, making the teacher look substantially better.  Unfortunately, they were all still terrible.  They don't teach conversational English in Japan, it's honestly not their fault.  It's a completely different discipline to writing, utilising different areas of the brain and requiring completely different skills.

The answer wasn't quite so simple this time.  You can't just eliminate all the grades leaving only an A grade.  The solution must have kept this years teacher up for some time; but arrive at a solution they did.  All the kids came into the test (two lines, 'I went to ....' And 'It was fun.') with worksheets.  The answers handwritten by the students, copied from the blackboard prior to the test.  They read from them without even looking up.  Instead of walking in and leaving after speaking Japanese, they now walk in (heads down, dejected), sit down, say their lines, then walk out.  It works brilliantly because it's impossible for anyone to score lower than a B, I barely have to say a word and the teacher of this grade looks like a hero.  Everyone wins!

Except the kids.  They continue on with their lives, oblivious to the massive lie they are a part of; condemned to work in starbucks and macdonalds, ironically learning more english there than they ever will here.

Anyway, the dude next to me has finished slurping the ever loving shit out of his noodles, so I feel it appropriate to point to the now worded gallery from last post.

Oh no, he's found more noodles.  I have to leave before he somehow creates an inter-dimensional vortex with his incessant slurping.