Monday 1 March 2010

Who Made me Fat? You Did, you Fat Cow.

Thank you for giving me something to write about, dumb blonde BBC presenter.

The first half of that sentence is the name of the programme, and the dumb blonde in questions name is... Actually I don't care.  To give her name is to validate her existence.

Anyway; she was amazed to find that more offers are placed on junk food than other foods.  This is simple economics...  The thing that makes you the most money is the thing that goes fastest through your doors, volume is the name of the game in supermarkets, as it is with most industries.  To put offers on products that sell the highest volume (and are therefore most profitable) is merely catering for an obese market.

Morrisons was the butt of this particular programme.  In a presenter like tone, an amazing 62% of Morrisons products promoted in deals are high in sugar or salt!  Literally amazing!


Actually no it isn't.  38% of their products are not unhealthy, and these are the products no one buys, and are also presumably the perishable items.  Such a large percentage of healthy foods frankly, amazes me.  By percentage of food we actually eat that should be around 5%.

I wonder if this woman writes this stuff herself.  I would have more respect for her if she were simply a politician-like puppet, strings pulled by the BHA or somesuch health organisation.

AND APPARENTLY EATING TOO MUCH SUGAR CAUSES OBESITY!  That's amazing.  And that's also a direct quote.  She was amazed to find this out.  All I can say is this:

Jesus Christ.

Yeah she's moderately attractive, but still, she couldn't hold a conversation with a five year old.  To quote another fantastic and mentally stimulating televisual series, 'snog, marry or avoid,' she is a definite 'snog.'

She's goddamned stupid.

Jesus.

Seriously.

Oh and she is a normal sized person, blaming all of lifes problems on someone else, getting people to lobby against food giants, because all human beings are incapable of looking after themselves.


And I'm going to end with a direct quote: 'oh no, it appears the public health minister is leaving the responsibility of our diets in our hands.'

OH NO I CANNOT HANDLE THE PRESSURE, THE STRESS.  When I get stressed I usually eat junk foo... Shit.  I'm going to die of obesity.  Why doesn't the government make only healthy foods available for purchase.  Oh, and while you're at it, I want a government sponsored person to cut up my food... Oh wait, while they're there they can feed me too.  Brilliant.  Problem solved.

Bye bye.

1 comment:

  1. hahahahahahahahahaha ha
    that's really funny!

    you will probably find, though, that she is sponsored by some organisation or other

    like I say who wants to live in an environment like this where people actually watch and absorb this trash and start to believe it... we're lost

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