The Penis Train

So china has the fastest train in the world, as of right now.  This isn't including concept trains, as the Japanese have a floating train that they've tested to three hundred miles per hour.  It's not out yet, but it doesn't have wheels so I can't foresee any problems with track laying.  (This is a lie, it does have wheels that unfold from inside the train, for any speed below eighty miles per hour).

The point being, the fastest train in Japan right now is called (name of the fastest train here) (I want to guess at Nozomi, but it might not be).  It's a massive phallus.  There are countless pictures of foreigners standing in front of the advertisement pretending to do all kinds of things, and the actual train doesn't disappoint.  I ended up riding it on Sunday, on account of needing to be whisked from Tokyo to my house in as quick a time as possible; regardless of cost.

Nothing is displayed on this board, I don't know what purpose it serves.

This is the local train station board.  Everything is a bit rusty, a bit old, and somewhat grimy.  The contrast is quite stark considering this

Seen from an oblique angle, the shape is actually fascinating.  Doubtless, many thousands of hours of modelling and testing were done.

was the train I returned home on.  Obviously, it didn't deliver me to the door.  The bullet trains run on specialist tracks.  I don't know if they're a different guage, but they're certainly smoother than anything else.  When a train runs through a station at full-tilt (I doubt they actually pass through at full speed) everything shakes, and the noise is immense.  It's like the intercity expresses in England - everything shakes and vibrates and there is incredible noise.  The difference is that these trains are doing a hundred MPH, whereas the English trains are just pulling out of the station to get underway.

Not an awe inspiring station, but it serves a purpose.

The station I got off at was massive.  I was the only person that got off.  That's plainly not efficient.

It feels like the window is merely an after-thought.  I wonder if the drivers even needs to see outside to pilot one of these things.  Interestingly enough, the aeroplane comparisons are apt, as the inside is basically a plane interior.

And this is the front of the train.  Or the back, as was the case in this instance.  I tried to de-emphasize certain qualities with the picture.  Interestingly, that front nobbly bit comes off for when they want to attach two front cars together.  All the cars are powered, this reduces wear and tear on the track and helps the speed, apparently.

My shirt was completely clean.  The team must have dominated - leaving the fullback with nothing to do.

Of the rugby; someone forgot our regular shirts.  We had to beg for another set of shirts; these were worn minutes before in another game.  Nice.

Just pushin' water around.

This is a typical view around my home town.  There are tons of rice fields and people moving water from one end of the field to the other.  I never know what they're doing.

A familiar sight all over England, for a day.  Then the bikes are stolen.

These bicycles have been at the station at least as long as I've been in the town.  With the levels of rust present, I suspect they've been here somewhat longer.

These bullet trains are extremely long.

The fastest shinkansen has a rather fetching green, pink and white livery.  I'm not sure why they went with those vomit inducing colours, but it certainly stands out.  White is so last year, apparently.