I Use a Lot of Painkillers

Warning.  This post is going to contain a lot of swearing.  It's also not going to make much sense gramatically, and it's going to have a lot of spelling mistakes.

I'm in far too much pain to give a flyingfuck about any of those things.

I have had the flu for a week now.  I can't remember whether I've written about being deathly sick or not, frankly at this point I don't care.  I am in a lot of fucking pain.  So much fucking pain.

I have used up all my painkillers.  I don't havae any left.  I had some soluble ones shipped in from the UK because I get a lot of sore throats due to not having tonsils.  Also due to me having ear infections a lot.  It's 4 am by the way, I've not slept.  This is common.  I do not sleep much on account of being insomniacal.

I was told that the UK stopped selling co-codamol.  Ona ccount of there being codeiene in it.  I think this is a lie, because the amount of codeine in co codamol is tiny.  I think the person that told me this thinks I have a codeiene addiction.  Which is hilarious, because I have no taken codenene in two or more years now.  I simply wanted the painkiller because IT'S THE ONLY ONE THAT WORKS.  GEE I WISH I HAD SOME NOW.  I WISH I HAD SOME PAINKILLER THAT WORKED. 

Prior to me running out, I was taking far above and beyond the recommended daily amount.  It still does not work.  I do not understand how people take paracetemol or ibuprofen for their headaches or general pains - they do not work.

When people ask me why I don't take painkillers if I have a headache I respond by saying that they don't work.  They respond by saying well it's better than nothing.  No it fucking isn't moron.  It's extra work for your kidneys and liver, it's extra money quite literally pissed away.  It's a disgusting taste.  There is no benefit to taking painkillers that do not work.

I wish I had some painkillers right now.

When I get sick, or cold, or hot, or get a spot somwewhere on my body, or look at a window, or car, or if I scratch my head, I get an ear infection.  I think this is because I've always had shit ears, coupled with the no tonsils, and gandular fever resulting in my body a not having a immune system.

The great thing is, I get by in terms of the pain by pretending 4 paracetemol are actually one tablet, and then banging my head against something hard until I am unconscious.  Or, I use co codamol GODDAMN I WISH I HAD SOME PAINKILLERS THAT WORKED RIGHT NO,w, and ice my throat with anti-feeling spray and don't sleep, because you can't sleep with that much pain.  I just zone out until I need to swallow, move my tongue, move my head or jaw.  Now, because I have no painkillers, I can't eve zone out.  I can't focus on anything but the pain.  It's been six hours of just thinking about the pain and I'm rready to scream.  I want out.  Fuck this fucking pain.  Fuck my ears. 

I don't know why thes time is so bad.  I just want it to stop.

Stop

Stop

Stop

Just fucking stop already.

Fucking hell.

I can't focus on the screen because my head is fucking me over, so that'll do.  Fuck off pain.